They say you fall in love all over again the moment you hold your baby for the first time.
My pregnancy was the longest 10 months of my life. I was shocked to hear that I was pregnant, and blamed the "new doctor" (to put it nicely) who was prescribing my new birth control. I was in tears with a million things running through my mind. It was hard telling our families, being an unmarried couple, but everyone took to it quite well.
Then the problems started. I was the most miserable, fattest pregnant woman on the planet. I tried to squeeze into my jeans for the longest time, and would be in tears when they wouldn't fit (but I STILL kept trying, week after week). I had acne all over my face. I had developed gestational diabetes and had to give myself insulin injections 6 times a day, and prick my finger for blood 4 times a day. I am a Licensed Veterinary Technician, and it REALLY put into perspective what our diabetic patients go through. I was forced to go on early maternity leave, due to having placenta previa. The baby's placenta was covering the opening of the cervix (gross!). I was put on strict bed rest until further notice.
My pregnancy was the longest 10 months of my life. I was shocked to hear that I was pregnant, and blamed the "new doctor" (to put it nicely) who was prescribing my new birth control. I was in tears with a million things running through my mind. It was hard telling our families, being an unmarried couple, but everyone took to it quite well.
Then the problems started. I was the most miserable, fattest pregnant woman on the planet. I tried to squeeze into my jeans for the longest time, and would be in tears when they wouldn't fit (but I STILL kept trying, week after week). I had acne all over my face. I had developed gestational diabetes and had to give myself insulin injections 6 times a day, and prick my finger for blood 4 times a day. I am a Licensed Veterinary Technician, and it REALLY put into perspective what our diabetic patients go through. I was forced to go on early maternity leave, due to having placenta previa. The baby's placenta was covering the opening of the cervix (gross!). I was put on strict bed rest until further notice.
Great. After about a week on bed rest, I wanted to gouge my eyes out with a screwdriver. My diabetes wasn't regulated, and my blood sugar would either be super high or really low. I was beyond frustrated and FAT.
Fast forward a couple of months: One of the scariest times of my life. I was admitted into the hospital for approximately a month, when I stood up from the couch and was soaked in blood. And I was freaking out because I thought my water broke (I was reading about mucus plugs that morning and it skeeved me the hell out! Can't they come up with a better name? How about "uterine cork"?). The baby's placenta started detaching. I was told that they may have to deliver her early, but they had to take me to another hospital because they don't have a NICU. A hospital that was over and hour away from my family.
Upon arrival, of course, with my luck, it was a teaching hospital. I had at LEAST 4 doctors at a time looking into my private area like it was a freak show. Apparently, none of them have seen a vagina before. Poking, prodding, disgusting. I wanted to sleep, and they were all excited and jittery from their midnight coffee. I was told they would deliver her the next morning.
Doctor checks in next morning, thinks it's best to keep her inside so she has time to develop before she hatches. Get another doctor the next morning, they think we should deliver her. Yet another doctor begs to differ. It was such an emotional roller coaster. Doctors of all sorts were coming in to see me like I was some zoo exhibit (which is appropriate, because I felt like an elephant).
Fast forward a couple of months: One of the scariest times of my life. I was admitted into the hospital for approximately a month, when I stood up from the couch and was soaked in blood. And I was freaking out because I thought my water broke (I was reading about mucus plugs that morning and it skeeved me the hell out! Can't they come up with a better name? How about "uterine cork"?). The baby's placenta started detaching. I was told that they may have to deliver her early, but they had to take me to another hospital because they don't have a NICU. A hospital that was over and hour away from my family.
Upon arrival, of course, with my luck, it was a teaching hospital. I had at LEAST 4 doctors at a time looking into my private area like it was a freak show. Apparently, none of them have seen a vagina before. Poking, prodding, disgusting. I wanted to sleep, and they were all excited and jittery from their midnight coffee. I was told they would deliver her the next morning.
Doctor checks in next morning, thinks it's best to keep her inside so she has time to develop before she hatches. Get another doctor the next morning, they think we should deliver her. Yet another doctor begs to differ. It was such an emotional roller coaster. Doctors of all sorts were coming in to see me like I was some zoo exhibit (which is appropriate, because I felt like an elephant).
Christmas Eve came, and I begged and pleaded for them to let me go home to my family. I was laying in bed all day long for a month at the hospital, which is something I could do at home...without people poking at my woman parts multiple times per day (my husband wouldn't even do it!). They finally let me go home and I was SO READY TO LEAVE!
Christmas came and went. I was frustrated with being pregnant. I was fat. I was a hot mess. I was sick of peeing every 30 minutes, and not being able to eat cake. CAKE! OH MY GOD, I MISSED CAKE SO MUCH!
The doctor planned on inducing me on January 18, 2012. We were supposed to get a blizzard that day. I woke up on the 17th to a lot more bleeding (but of course) than usual, and was told to go to the hospital. I just figured I would stay overnight and be induced the next morning, but I was getting a C-section that day. They never really told me I was getting one, they just started setting up for it and making me sign papers. They gave my husband a gown and mask and then it was go-time! I don't really remember much, except for the spinal block. They had to stick me multiple times and told me it would provide pain relief for up to 24 hours (thank god) and that I would be thanking them later...And I did!
I remember the doctor telling me he was taking the baby out. It was the longest couple of minutes of my life. All I could think of was "OMG, is she alive?! What if it's not a girl? What if we bought all of these pink things and it's a boy!?". I heard her cry for the first time. I remember saying to my husband, Joe, "She sounds like a cat". And she did. Her cry wasn't annoying in any way (unless it was waking us up at ungodly hours of the night). I couldn't hug/hold her, because the nurses had strapped me to the C-section operating table like Jesus was on the cross. But I remember smelling her and she smelled like a fresh baby...I guess what's what my uterus smells like...?
Christmas came and went. I was frustrated with being pregnant. I was fat. I was a hot mess. I was sick of peeing every 30 minutes, and not being able to eat cake. CAKE! OH MY GOD, I MISSED CAKE SO MUCH!
The doctor planned on inducing me on January 18, 2012. We were supposed to get a blizzard that day. I woke up on the 17th to a lot more bleeding (but of course) than usual, and was told to go to the hospital. I just figured I would stay overnight and be induced the next morning, but I was getting a C-section that day. They never really told me I was getting one, they just started setting up for it and making me sign papers. They gave my husband a gown and mask and then it was go-time! I don't really remember much, except for the spinal block. They had to stick me multiple times and told me it would provide pain relief for up to 24 hours (thank god) and that I would be thanking them later...And I did!
I remember the doctor telling me he was taking the baby out. It was the longest couple of minutes of my life. All I could think of was "OMG, is she alive?! What if it's not a girl? What if we bought all of these pink things and it's a boy!?". I heard her cry for the first time. I remember saying to my husband, Joe, "She sounds like a cat". And she did. Her cry wasn't annoying in any way (unless it was waking us up at ungodly hours of the night). I couldn't hug/hold her, because the nurses had strapped me to the C-section operating table like Jesus was on the cross. But I remember smelling her and she smelled like a fresh baby...I guess what's what my uterus smells like...?
After wheeling me back into the room, and seeing her, I held her for a whopping 5 seconds, before I had to hand her off to my husband and vomit. I was puking all day and only held her 2 or 3 times, since it was hard for me to juggle a baby and a puke bucket (that was my first attempt at multi-tasking as a Mom). But there was no doubt that I was in love. I got butterflies in my tummy the first time I met her. She was perfect. I was worried she would have a weird-shaped head, but it was perfect. Her little fingers and toes were perfect. Everything about her was perfect. I was just hoping she would have my nose.
Fast forward, 18 months later and my, how my life has changed! I went from calling my Mom at all hours of the morning, crying hysterically (Kaitlyn was a colicky baby and had a formula allergy, so things were kind of complicated). I used to make bottles at night, but pour the milk in the bottle, forgetting the liner, so it would go all over the counter...And I didn't notice until I was halfway up the steps. There were times where she would fall asleep on me, and I would not want to move but I had to pee, and would just pray that I didn't have to sneeze or I would pee my pants. Being a new Mom was harder than I had imagined. I was unable to breast feed, and had to hear comments about how breast feeding is better than bottle feeding, etc. Well, duh. It's nobody's business what I decide to do with my boobs. Why did they care so much about my boobs? In a way, I wish I could have, because her formula smelled awful. It smelled like brewer's yeast and you couldn't get the smell out of anything!
